When you enter the years of rebellion(aka puberty), a lot of things will change at once along with your hormones(that’s obvious).
There are a lot of things you are going to give a damn about, and here I am to remind you that most things in life require not giving a damn.
And when you are passing down these teen years, there will be a lot of stuff going on at once.
So, here are two stoic principles I wish I knew when I was 15.
Know what you control, and what you don’t.
“The chief task in life is simply this: to seperate the choice I dont control and which i actually control.Epictetus
As a teenager, a lot of things are not in your control, things like what he/she thinks of you, what your friends think of you, what your so-called “social media” friends think of you.
You don’t have any control over these.
In your friend circle, someone might have a nice car or an expensive phone, and you may have a cheap one or none, and sometimes you start to believe that others look down on you, which maybe they do, but as a consequence of that thought, you try to convince your parents to get a smartphone for you and trust me, no matter what you have, they will still judge you.
So in situations like these, you have to know, what the other person thinks of me, is not in my control, what those guys at the party thinks of me is not in my control, what my family thinks of me is not in my control.
At every uncomfortable moment, ask yourself, what is in my control and what’s not, and for the stuff that’s not in your control.
Please choose not to give a damn.
“People buy things they don’t need, with money they don’t have, to impress people they don’t like.”Clive Hamilton
Life is suddenly going to get tough. Until Now your life was on autopilot, but from now on, you are in charge, and you are going to take every failure, every rejection, and every discomfort very seriously.
And some bad things might happen. Like you might get your heart broke, you might have a fight with your parents or friend, maybe you score badly in exams and you don’t feel good about yourself.
On the other side, you will also have a lot of fun these years, you might go to some parties, you will explore new things, and life will move from extreme happiness to complete sadness in less than a second.
This happens to everyone, you are not alone.
And what the idea of Amor fati says is that, love your fate.
I know it’s easy to say, but what other option do you have?
Being angry, frustrated, sad is not going to make it any better, so why not be happy with it.
Because the truth is, sadness and happiness are two sides of the same coin called life.
And I remember I use to always whine about it, that “why does this happen to me?”
Over the years I have realised that life is not happy or sad, good or bad, it is what it is, plain and simple, it’s a roller coaster of emotions, so the next time something unexpected happens.
Good or bad, be curious about that feeling.
Here’s a reminder
No matter what, the world does not end, so the problems you might be facing right now, you will always come out of it, and when you grow older and reflect on them, most of the problems, you won’t even remember.
So, know what’s in your control and what’s not and love your Fate.
Live to the fullest, because these years will never come back.
Inspirations – https://ryanholiday.net
Thumbnail -Illustration In the Book, https://www.amazon.in/Boy-Who-Would-Be-King-ebook/dp/B08WJYV38C